Monday, September 6, 2010

Never jump to conclusions... It could break your heart

So near, yet so far away...

"Soul-mates are people who bring out the best in you. They are not perfect but are always perfect for you" ~ EXPLORE

It was my soul mate that got away. It was all a total misunderstanding, too. We were very young, and still searching to find out who we were, and getting an education.

My soul mate went out of state with a couple of his friends, just to explore life, and see a bit of the world, in Arizona.

We were expected to marry at some point in time by his family. He was the oldest child of eight children, seven boys and one girl.

I was only 13 when we met. He was 15. He was not a very handsome young man, but he was very creative, and had a wonderfully deep and caring personality. He was well over six feet in height, and really lanky, with a ruddy complexion. But, he always treated me with respect. The two of us enjoyed sharing whatever we had to talk about.

Even though he was dyslexic, he had a wonderful mind. Dyslexia had not even been known at that time, as it was in the late 1950s. He had been promoted in school again and again, without anyone really addressing his reading problem.

We didn't even know each other until that day. He was visiting my friend's brothers. My friend and I were upstairs laughing and talking about girl stuff.

Neither of us were even aware he was downstairs talking with my older sister. Vi was helping him with his reading problem. My sister was going on eighteen, so her motives were admirable. Besides, she was carrying torch of one of my friend's brothers.

Later, when my sister and I were driving home, she told me that he felt badly about our laughing. He thought we were laughing at him trying to read.

I felt so bad for him, and I wanted him to know that I had no idea the he was even there. I called my friend to get his phone number so I could explain and try to set things straight. Besides, I would never on earth laugh at anyone for something that was beyond their control like that.

We got into a long conversation, and things progressed from there. Only once did he even attempt anything inappropriate. Once I made myself clear on the issue, he never again even try to cross that line again, not in the four years we were considered a couple.

The misunderstanding:

After he had been away in Arizona for a couple of months, I received his most recent letter. That letter broke my heart. He stated that if I wanted to date anyone else, it was alright.

I took that to mean he had found someone else that he was interested in, and was probably dating them.

That was more than forty-eight years ago, and I still miss him in my life. It took more than a year before I even thought about dating anyone else. I cried myself to sleep nearly every night.

Eventually, I met the man I married. He passed away in 1995 of Brain Cancer. I never even considered thinking about anyone else possibly sharing my life until the last couple of years. My first love began popping up in my head again.

Did I tell you that when my soul mate finally visited my parents, who lived next door to my family and I, we invited them all to dinner at our place.

His wife was almost an exact duplicate of myself, (physically anyway). We could have passed for sisters, if not almost identical twins. Needless to say, she hated me, as I'm sure she also saw the similarity.

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