Sunday, July 24, 2011

Update on My Experiences With Death and Dying (07/26/2011)

Being there for a friend or relative is critical to them. You may be able to make it a little easier for them, just knowing that you are there. Dying all alone isn't a good way to die.
"Facing Death of Loved One"

This is a very difficult topic for me, as within a two year period, from when I was between six and eight years old, I lost a beloved nine year old cousin Lucille, from Muscular Dystrophy, a family pet, a dog named Wags why died of Distemper, and an eight year old cousin Jerry, who died as a result of burns sustained when he was playing with matches and gasoline in the garage, while his parents were in the house on Easter Sunday. I was also under death watch, as I was also not supposed to live to see the age of nine years. That was all from 1951 to 1953. 

Also during this time period, my Mother was ill with Rheumatic Fever, had my younger sister, who was born with a birth defect and going through several surgeries to repair the damage. 

As an adult, I have been able to help care for several terminally ill friends and acquaintances, and neighbors. My late husband and I helped provide end of life care to an old friend, who I had known since I was ten. "Shorty" was in his eighties, when he was diagnosed with stomach and liver cancer. This was in the early 1980s. Shorty wanted to die at home, and his family needed some help around the clock, helping with care, meals, etc. 

My husband there when Shorty died. His daughter really took it very hard, and begged me to do CPR, even though we all knew it was useless. However, since she really needed to let his death soak in, so I did CPR, as well as mouth-to-mouth respiration on Shorty, and it gave Susan some time to let things soak into her head. 

There have since then, been several other times when I did hospice type care for other neighbors, and even for one woman I really personally disliked. There was no one else ready to step up to the plate though, and someone needed to do it, as well as their needing someone they could talk to about the things they could not talk about to their friends. They needed someone who understood, and that would respect their final wished. So, I did it, and though it is never easier, it is something I am or was able to do, and it made their last days easier, I suppose. 

Of course, when my own mother died, I was there, and that was of course the hardest of all. Mom was not quite seventy years old, when she died of kidney failure in 1982. 

My husband died on August 16, 1995 of Brain Cancer, at the age of fifty-five. It doesn't get easier, just more familiar. 

Just this past week, I lost a cousin who was only fifty-two, of a heart attack related to the heat wave hitting Georgia, with high humidity. 

While it did help me deal with such losses, I'm not sure I can really say I have to this day fully recovered from it all. Eventually, the mental images of their last days and their final breaths fade somewhat, and you begin to recall some of the better times. Keep those to the fore, and it really does help.
By searching God's Word,
we find the truth
about death and how
we can live forever
here on a paradise earth. 
What helps most is the knowledge that the Bible teaches that our heavenly Father, Jehovah (Yahweh) have promised that he will resurrect everyone in the memorial tombs, and teach them what he has been trying to get humanity to know for thousands of years.  That being that death is not natural to humanity, that we inherited death and sinning from out original earthly parents, Adam and Eve, when they betrayed God, and were disobedient to his law, stealing fruit that did not belong to them.  Once they became independent from God's close companionship, they no longer had a chance to live forever, as they would have if they had simply obeyed.

That is the whole reason that Jesus, God's Son came to earth, to die as a ransom sacrifice, thereby buying obedient humans, who listened to what he said to do, and who listened to his teachings, instead of false teachers.  Jesus bought humans an opportunity to live forever, in peach and good health, here on earth, without crime, sickness, hunger, or any of the other things that make live miserable now.

Update: Tuesday, July 26, 2011: 
I received a phone call yesterday afternoon, from my friend, Colista, of whom I have previously written. 
Colista is the one who had a ruptured aneurysm in her brain several years ago. She was not supposed to have survived that, but even after several months in a coma, and three brain surgeries, she did survive. She has some lasting effects from the ordeal, such that require medication to help prevent seizures, and pain control. 

Her call yesterday was after she had a followup CAT Scan. They now tell her that she has two tumors about the size of a thumb print. Now, they will be doing more testing, so find out if the tumors are malignant or benign. 

So far, she is taking it better that I would expect. You see, her sister also has brain Cancer, and though she has had surgeries to buy her more time, she is really living on borrowed time.

I will try to keep you informed as is reasonable and non-intrusive for my friend. She doesn't read online, so I know she will not accidentally find this. She knows I occasionally write about her, her pets, and other things going on with some of my friends. 
Death, as man's last and worse enemy will be done away with. If you have a Bible, look up this scripture: Revelations 21:4;  In modern English, it says: "And He will wipe out every tear from their eyes, and death will be no more, neither will mourning or outcry nor pain be anymore!  The former things have passed away."

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